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    lessons from 2018: gardening works

    January 6, 2019 /

    I wrote about gardener versus carpenter parenting last September (read the whole post for a better explanation), but even before I had heard about this amazing parenting analogy (see, more…

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    sxtwo

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sarabytheseason
“We were never perfect. Yet, the journey we mak “We were never perfect. Yet, the journey we make together is perfect on this earth who was once a star and made the same mistakes as humans. We might make them again, she said. Crucial to finding the way is this: there is no beginning or end. You must make your own map.” Joy Harjo #joyharjo #wildwisdomforwednesday #makeyourownmap #poetry #amaptothenextworld #wildwisdomforwednesdayonthursday🤦🏻‍♀️
The baby years were next level exhausting, but I’d take the sleeplessness and unknowns of the baby days over the near constant feeling that you’re doing it wrong, the sheer helplessness of knowing you have to let them figure it out but also somehow when it’s time for you to step in, the loneliness that comes with bigger kid problems because it isn’t right to blab about their struggles like you could vent about sleep training or toddler tantrums. And yet. Our kids are growing into the most interesting people I know, and I pretty much want to hang out with them all the time (well, maybe like 75 percent of the time 😜). I assume your kids are the coolest too. If us parents can’t think and say so, who can?! There’s certainly not enough support for parents of newborns, but it feels like there’s barely any for those of us in the weeds with bigger kids navigating the big, weighty questions, endlessly apologizing for screwing it up, and figuring it out as we go along. I’m not looking for any affirmation here because I know y’all are kind enough to offer them; I just wanted to write down some of what I’m feeling in this weird, beautiful and brutal season of parenting we find ourselves in. #biggerkidseason #parenting
This is 42: dropping off one kid at soccer practic This is 42: dropping off one kid at soccer practice while @gsterley coaches the other one’s basketball practice…so Wendell and I get to go sit in the back and listen to the evening bird song while the sun sets. 42 is GLORIOUS so far! 😜 Wrote some words today about what I’ve been learning lately in my newsletter - subscribe at the link in my profile! #spring #whatimlearninglately #birdsong #sunsetritual #maythefourthbewithyou
“Remembering place is significant, and that incl “Remembering place is significant, and that includes each visitor to a place, insect, plant, animal, or the passing shadow of a cloud in golden sunlight.” -Linda Hogan #lindahogan #wildwisdomforwednesday #knowyourplaceloveyourplace #morethanhumanworld
Beltane blessings! 🌱 It’s been raining and co Beltane blessings! 🌱 It’s been raining and cold for days and doesn’t feel much like Beltane, but we have three bluebird nests full of eggs promising that official planting season is near! #liveseasonally #spring #beltane #mayday #crossquarterday #bluebirds #spring
“Here is a lesson: what happens to people and wh “Here is a lesson: what happens to people and what happens to the land is the same thing.” Linda Hogan #lindahogan #wildwisdomforwednesday #wearenature #itsallconnected #knowyourplaceloveyourplace #healthelandhealourselves
Last spring, we lost our long fight against the de Last spring, we lost our long fight against the developer that, this spring, cut down hundreds of old, old trees to make way for too many houses in too small of a space in the midst of a flood plain. We grieve to the depth at which we love, so it’s been a rough several weeks at our place, surrounded by so much destruction. I have zero cohesive thoughts, but I did make a list of things I’ve been contemplating: • It’s our responsibility - and honor! - to bear witness to loss, whether seemingly big or small. The loss of these old forests was big to us and to so many birds, animals, insects, and plants; how pretentious of us to go about our days acting as if only our losses matter. • Grieving fully grows our capacity for empathy. In this way, grief is a door to growth and healing. • The more we learn about the natural world, the more complex we find it. Perhaps we should pay attention and get curious instead of wantonly destroying Her. • I’m complicit in this destruction by the way I live, spend, and invest - and that too is my responsibility. • On the day of the worst of the destruction, I’ve never heard so much birdsong in the nearly seven years of living and listening out here as I did that day. It seemed as if the birds lost their homes and found temporary sanctuary here before mostly going off to find somewhere new to call home. • I often say “know your place to love your place,” but what does it mean when your place has become one surrounded by so much destruction? This is a question that we’ll all be wrestling with as the climate disaster comes closer to our doors and our beloved places. • I’ve been thankful for the ways in which the people that care for us have been kind and gentle with us, acknowledging and not downplaying this loss. I want to be more like them when I grow up. • I cried like a baby at the gym today when this song came on, and then laughed at myself because I didn’t realize it was a love song instead of a song about her love for her place. But then I realized that it didn’t really matter since it spoke something true for me - “this land that you pass over is my heart, is my daily bread.” Music and art are beautiful in that way ❤️
“As for me, I have a choice between honoring tha “As for me, I have a choice between honoring that dark life I've seen so many years moving in the junipers, or of walking away and going on with my own human busyness. There is always that choice for humans.” Linda Hogan #lindahogan #wildwisdomforwednesday #roadlesstraveled #thenarrowway #swimmingupstream
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