august 2021: what I’m learning and loving

Even though I like to think of spring as my actual new year, I do love the fresh start that comes with August when the kids go back to school, and, even though I haven’t been in actual school for nearly two decades, I always want to go out and buy some fancy new pens and notebooks. It’s been a full month around here, and here is what I’ve been learning and loving…

What I’m loving

The Habit app. I downloaded this earlier this summer, and I love how flexible it is and how much it syncs up with. It syncs up with the Apple Health app, so it will automatically sync up workouts, steps, and anything else you have your Health app tracking. I also love this water app, and it syncs up with that automatically. I’ve tried nineteen different paper and electronic habit trackers, but this is my favorite so far because, most importantly, I’m actually using it and because it allows me to edit my habits in a way that works for me.

Chums. Despite living in the south during college, I resisted croakies/”eyeglass retainers” for years because I thought I wasn’t southern enough for them. Grant bought me some in Black Mountain, and who knew such a simple thing could make such a difference?! I have these, and I love them and I’m never going back.

These leggings. I tried these leggings because I wanted to try some higher-waisted leggings based on a recommendation from Gee, Thanks, and they feel glorious. 

Cover Your A$$ets. I’ve had this game for at least two years, but every time I tried to convince the family to learn it, they said no (the boys don’t like learning new games – they prefer to play our tried-and-trues). But we went to Black Mountain for Labor Day, and I insisted on us giving it a real try. We learned it the first night and were obsessed the rest of the time. You can play it with two people (always a win in my book), it’s fast-paced, and competitive. Plus, it has over 11,000 five star reviews on Amazon, and the kids like to say the name very slowly so that they feel like they’re getting away with saying a cuss word in front of us.

What I’m learning

We’re all hypocrites about something(s). I keep noticing that I have this tendency to be very black-and-white on some topics, while embracing santosha and nuance in plenty of other aspects of my life. For example, I get very judgmental on stuff like climate change and that gay people should be able to get married, but am very live-and-let-live on other stuff. I think that’s good on the one hand – we need to know what lights us up to be able to direct our lives and energy appropriately. But, as I listened to this episode of Pantsuit Politics, I realized that I’m more interested in having conversations with people who accept the complexity of issues versus those who ignore it – which means I need to be more humble and open because I want to be the kind of person who sees how so much of what we’re dealing with in 2021 is very complex and nuanced. 

But this also helps me set boundaries around the kinds of conversations I’ll expend energy on: if I notice that I’m conversing with someone who wants to talk about abortion as if there are easy black-and-white answers, I can quickly excuse myself from that conversation because it isn’t likely going to be worth my time and energy. Accepting that we’re all complex, nuanced human beings helps me give myself and others more grace. And I’m hopeful that it helps me become clearer – and more fierce – about the beliefs and values that I hold most dear.

The original meaning of competition. In this episode of Ten Percent Happier, I learned that the Latin root of the word “compete” means to strive together. I wonder how different our world would be if we thought more of striving together instead of our more traditional cutthroat understanding of competition. 

Frontloading. There’s a meme that I can’t find at the moment, but it is something like the person feels like their whole world is on fire and really they just need a snack and a glass of water. I relate. So I downloaded this app a few months ago to help remind me to drink more water. I do notice that I have a bit longer fuse throughout the day when I’m getting plenty of water. As I’ve gotten older and had a few kids, I always seem to have to pee in the middle of the night, so I have been trying to “frontload” my water intake earlier in the day so I don’t have to get up in the middle of the night. I’m still working on it, but the app helps because it has a little body that you try to fill up by the end of the day. So if I can mostly “fill up” the body on the app by 4 or so, I’m less likely to drink as much in the evening – and sleep through the night. 

But I’ve been wondering how this idea of frontloading might apply to other stuff beyond my water intake. If I can identify the top 2-3 things I need to do each day and frontload them, I’ll probably feel better when my head hits the pillow each night.

Huberman Lab podcast. I found this podcast early in August and have been bingeing it. I honestly think it is some kind of coping mechanism to not deal with the world and instead learn about neuroscience, but whatever! It’s better than some other coping mechanisms I use. Some things I’ve learned that have actually stuck:

• Get your eyes in the sunlight as soon as possible after waking up – two-ten minutes within 30 minutes of waking is what science shows works best. This kick starts our circadian clock, so it’ll wake us up better for the day, but it also will in turn help us fall asleep more easily around 15ish hours later. I’ve started doing my morning movement outside facing the east – I’ll keep you posted on how long this lasts once it gets cold and the sun rises later. [See this episode]. 
• Don’t take melatonin. I don’t take melatonin because I don’t have any issue (typically) falling asleep – my problem is more staying asleep. But melatonin is a hormone (guess I had never learned that before?), so taking it in supplement form in large doses isn’t great for most of us and also inhibits puberty so especially not great for kids. [See this episode].
• Timing of movement matters. For best results in terms of gains, it’s best to workout at the end of the day, but before dinner, preferably between 3-6. But if you’re looking for more of an energy boost, it’s best to workout as close to waking up as possible. [See this episode].
• The science behind the physiological sigh. Yoga already taught me this, but I loved the science! [See this episode].
• Dopamine is the molecule of more, and it operates on a see-saw of sorts between pleasure and pain. You want to keep the see-saw balanced as much as possible because if you go way off the charts on the pleasure side of things, the system requires that there be an equal amount of pain to even things out. If you only listen to one of his episodes, make it this one.  

Ok, it’s your turn: what are you loving and learning lately?