lessons from 2018: meditation = sports

I like to learn in analogies. Things seem to stick better when I can find a comparison that works for me. Earlier this year, I heard that saying, “I meditate” was like someone saying, “I play sports.” (I think I heard this via the 10% Happier Podcast, but I can’t find a specific episode). You wouldn’t say that you play sports; you would say that you play volleyball or soccer or tennis. In the same way, meditating is a big umbrella term for many different types of practices.

This has been so freeing for me both individually and as a teacher because we tend to think of meditation as only sitting in perfect lotus pose with our hands in gyana mudra. And many of us have trouble doing this for more than three minutes without lots of practice – so then we think we just “aren’t good at meditating.”

Two things that this analogy has really helped me to grasp:

Just like sports, there are hundreds of different meditation techniques. If one doesn’t work for you, try another.
Meditation, like sports, is a practice. Don’t give up after a few sessions because you don’t think it is “working” or that you aren’t any good at it.

For my meditation practice, I have really come to love centering prayer (more resources here and here if you’re interested) and walking meditation. Grant uses time in the sauna and on his road bike as his meditation practice. Anything we do mindfully can be meditation. And, in my experience, a meditation practice helps me do more things mindfully throughout the day.

Here is a list of some techniques to try out for yourself. I also like to experiment with various techniques and teachers on the Insight Timer app, but I have found that I can tend to consume those various options instead of making a commitment and digging deep into one or two practices (this is likely an Enneagram 7 thing, so maybe this won’t be an issue for you). I see the most benefit when I commit to centering prayer daily.

Another thing I’ve learned by committing to a more regular meditation practice: there is no such thing at being “good” or “bad” at meditation; there is just doing the thing. The benefits don’t come immediately after a meditation session (at least in my experience), but instead arise gently after a commitment to the practice. It is a very subtle: I notice that I don’t get as hooked by an annoying experience or person as much as I used to or I am better able to see myself getting stressed or angry before lashing out or I simply am quicker to recognize when I have lashed out unfairly or, most profoundly for me, I am able to just be present to more of my life throughout the day.

The work of meditation is coming back to the practice, not necessarily staying “zen” or uncluttered for the entire twenty minutes (or 30 seconds) of your practice. My centering prayer teacher (check out her website for more resources) tells a story about Fr. Keating, who is one of the modern teachers credited with reviving centering prayer more recently. He was teaching centering prayer to a group of nuns, and a nun came up to him afterwards complaining that her mind wandered the entire time, maybe hundreds of times in the session. Fr. Keating responded, “That’s wonderful! That is hundreds of opportunities for you to return to God.” Even if you don’t see meditation as an opportunity to listen to God, you can replace that same thought with what works for you: opportunities to return to yourself, to stillness, to the Universe. Whatever you name it, the work of our meditation practice is in the return to the practice. So even if our minds are distracted or cluttered, any time we return to our intention for our practice is a “win.” Just by carving out the time for ourselves in stillness and quiet (whatever that looks like for you), we have already won.

I’m not always consistent with my practice, but in 2018, I saw first-hand the many benefits of finding a meditation technique or two that works best for me.